“Real music isn’t made with computers.”
Then I’ll probably need to get a job..
If you look in the dictionary at the word confused there is a picture of me with a sample sentence “Ryan Tafolla is the epitome of confused.”
I literally don’t know what I’m doing with my life, how to act like a normal human, or how to carry a conversation without having to explain my life story and holding back bursting out I love you and want to be with you forever to random strangers.
It’s a little insane how much actually changes in 365 days. I was in a completely different mindset last July then I was today. Right now it feels as if every choice I make is everlasting. I know it isn’t, it’s just the feel in the air. People assume that when you get to the 17-18 age range that you have mustered up enough knowledge to decide where to direct your future, and that every choice to make will affect the future. I guess I’m naive for asking, but is that true? It seems like I’m just buying into the bull train. Why should what I am still trying to figure out have eternal consequences? All I want to do as of now is play in a band and see the world. No kind of schooling sounds like what I want to do. College? Mesa? To the students of my high school this is all familiar talk. To me it sounds like nonsense.
Moving to New York sounds amazing. I believe I could do it. The only thing stopping me is my mother. I love her to death but she loves me to death. Ultimately I will have to get past that and make my own decisions, which is getting easier as I grow older. I run the risk of sounding immature but I need to have my own life. I could do what my cousin does. I could live alone. I could sweep the streets and make a living off the land. There’s always work for musicians like us.
This is the first day of my life. I start new here. I make my own choices. I choose my own direction.